I lose my want to run... more than lose the drive I should say. Because I do still dream of running and think about it all the time! Just when I think about put on the shoes and going through getting dressed I feel unmotivated to do so I feel like poop for blowing my big goal I really wanted and needed to do to show my self I can do things. But I guess living in a RV with my hubby and kids and work camping I should not let this stuff bugs me so much. Because we are doing what is right for the family as a whole here. Big but I feel like I felled my self here and why keep trying that is all I do... is fell... I got to say I hate ADHD and the ups and downs it comes with. I feel like all I am good at is F-inf up everything in my path. And I never meet many of my goals I set for my self ether. My husband to great he is so loving and tries his best to keep me happy and going he and the kids are a real blessing in my life without them I would not be as well out as I am.
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